The Strange Incident of the Bee in the Night

A terrible thing happened the other night, and it happened because I was trying to put something over on my husband.

I was sneaking to bed --- sneaking, because I had stayed up past 0430. Scott knows I get cranky when I stay up that late, so he really gives me crap when I do.

So, I snuck out of the bathroom, shutting off the light as I went. My plan was to get undressed in the spare room, so I wouldn't wake my husband. Only, somehow, I got confused where the door was and walked straight into the WALL.

With my FACE.

To illustrate this, stand up and take one good-sized, purposeful step in any direction. Notice how much speed you've picked up without even trying. Now imagine the unstoppable force that is your face coming to a sudden and unexpected stop by connecting with the immoveable object that is your house.

NOW you're getting the picture.

I staggered backwards, literally seeing stars. And completely confused, of course, as to what had happened --- expecting a door, I find a wall. I managed to get the bathroom light on and grabbed a handtowel to staunch the bleeding; I was conscious enough to select a red one.

Batting a couple of those annoying cartoon birds out of the way, I stumbled to the bedroom to wake Scott, being a complete coward and too scared to assess the damage on my own.

"'Ott. 'OTT!!" I choked through my mouthful of towel and blood. "'Ott, 'ake uh."

"Wha..." my beloved murmured from the land of Nod.

"'Ake uh, I ur eye ow, OW!" ::gurgle::

"What did you do now?!"

QUINN ::more gurgling::

SCOTT ::sympathetic wincing, followed by a leap into action::

When all was said and done, it ended up that the force of the blow caused me to bite THROUGH MY OWN LIP!! Scott gave me an icepack, asked me if I wanted to go to the emergency room (which didn't sound like a great idea; showing up at 0500 with a split lip, who's gonna believe I did it myself??), then put me to bed.

I'm pretty sure the inside cut could have used some stitches, but who the hell wants to get stitches inside their mouth?? Not me!!! I'm mainly feeling it in my pride, and my lip is ENORMOUS, but it looks like it's already starting to heal.

I also spent the rest of the night dreaming that I had knocked all my teeth out. So much for my secret life of deception, huh?